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Stephen Merchant
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My teeth are all right, but they are not American teeth, and my hair is not thick and luscious. Los Angeles is dense with beautiful people, and most of the men who are aspiring actors are 5ft 5in, so I tower above them.
- Stephen Merchant
#American
#Beautiful
#Hair
#Men
#People
Maybe there's a sort of veneer of optimism about U.S. comedy, whereas perhaps in England, we don't mind ending it on a sourer note.
- Stephen Merchant
#About
#Comedy
#Ending
#Mind
#Optimism
A lot of my comic influences are distinctly American: Woody Allen and Bob Hope, for example. They were always the underdogs who were using wit to sort of battle their way through. And it seems to me that a lot of contemporary U.S. comedies are shot through with losers. None of the characters in 'The Big Bang Theory,' for instance, are studs.
- Stephen Merchant
#American
#Battle
#Hope
#Me
#Way
You hear some people saying, 'I'm alive on stage; it's where I feel most complete...' I don't understand that at all; I find that weird and depressing. I don't dislike the audience; it's just when I'm up there, they're in the darkness. There's just a sound of laughing or not. They're not 'people,' they're this big organism.
- Stephen Merchant
#Alive
#Darkness
#Find
#Sound
#Weird
My heroes - people like Woody Allen - were stand-up comedians. Therefore, I always felt I should give it a go.
- Stephen Merchant
#Always
#Comedians
#Go
#Like
#People
Once I began doing stand-up, I didn't get a kick out of the applause or being the centre of attention - but I did get a kick out of the jigsaw puzzle aspect of it, searching for the right bit, adding another few pieces each night until the bigger picture appears. That's the appeal: the challenge of it.
- Stephen Merchant
#Challenge
#Doing
#Night
#Picture
#Puzzle
When I was a teenager, I met a comedian who I admired, and he was very rude to me. That's why when people come up to me I try not to be rude. I don't want to name who he is, but it really put me off watching his stuff since.
- Stephen Merchant
#Me
#People
#Try
#Watching
#Why
People don't mind insulting the tall. We're supposed to be fine with being awkward and skinny. I'm very easy to psychoanalyse. I was a gangly, awkward teenager who could make people laugh and thought that was a way to be socially more comfortable.
- Stephen Merchant
#Laugh
#Mind
#People
#Skinny
#Way
I'm always jealous of Johnny Depp's sense of style, but if I tried to get away with a floppy hat and waistcoat, I'd look like a homeless person.
- Stephen Merchant
#Always
#Hat
#Look
#Person
#Style
I very rarely laugh. I remember I used to have a joy at comedy. I remember going to see Sean Lock for the first time live, just in some comedy club when I was 18, and again, just guttural, pure laughter. I didn't know what he was doing; I couldn't see the tricks.
- Stephen Merchant
#Joy
#Laughter
#Live
#Remember
#Time
I'm too tall. I am 6ft 7in, so I've been most people's height at some point in my life, and 6ft 4in is the best. You're tall, but you don't have to bend when you go through a door.
- Stephen Merchant
#Best
#Door
#I Am
#Life
#My Life
A lot of stand-up comedians are actually very insecure, and they come on slightly battling the audience. They want to be the superior person in the room, sneering at the world. That can be very funny. But to me, what's more interesting is that the world is on my shoulders, and it's pushing me down.
- Stephen Merchant
#Funny
#Me
#Person
#Room
#World
When I started to mention to people who know about such things, 'I'm doing this game, 'Portal 2', they got very excited, suddenly. More excited than anything I've ever done before, weirdly. Gamers are incredibly enthusiastic about the stuff they love.
- Stephen Merchant
#Doing
#Game
#Know
#Love
#People
Remember that film 'Sliding Doors,' when John Hannah woos Gwyneth Paltrow by reciting Monty Python sketches? I can tell you now that doesn't work, so that film's wrong.
- Stephen Merchant
#Film
#I Can
#Remember
#Work
#Wrong
I have experienced bad dating and ineptitude with women all across the globe, from Vietnam to Paris. When I was 21, women were an enigma; they were this code that had to be cracked. They were 'The Other.' I have often thought writing this stuff into stand-up and shows would be an exorcism, but it hasn't been; it makes no difference.
- Stephen Merchant
#Bad
#Dating
#Difference
#Enigma
#Women
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