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Sam Kinison
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I don't deny my life-style is occasionally pretty wild.
- Sam Kinison
#Deny
#Occasionally
#Pretty
#Wild
I'd rather entertain people than offend them.
- Sam Kinison
#Entertain
#People
#Rather
#Than
#Them
It was like going to church, except Ozzy Osbourne was there.
- Sam Kinison
#Church
#Except
#Going
#Like
#Ozzy
What am I responsible for? Who am I responsible to? Everybody? How come when Archie Bunker nailed everybody, it was funny - but when I do it, it's not?
- Sam Kinison
#Come
#Funny
#How
#Who Am I
#Who
I have lived a carnal life.
- Sam Kinison
#Carnal
#Life
#Lived
Real comedy doesn't just make people laugh and think, but makes them laugh and change.
- Sam Kinison
#Change
#Comedy
#Laugh
#People
#Real
Anyone can go out on stage and start beating people over the head with rubber chickens. That'll get people's attention.
- Sam Kinison
#Attention
#Go
#People
#Stage
#Start
If I've learned one thing, it's 'don't tell the truth.' Lies keep you together.
- Sam Kinison
#Keep
#One Thing
#Tell
#Together
#Truth
I got divorced, which was not a good thing for a revivalist minister. It did not go down well. I'd already been banned from a couple churches for my jokes. So one day I woke up and decided it was time to start living for myself.
- Sam Kinison
#Day
#Good
#Myself
#Start
#Time
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
- Sam Kinison
#About
#Terrorism
#Two
#Worry
#Years
I guess they're tough jokes. But there's lots of things you either laugh or cry at. And you just can't cry.
- Sam Kinison
#Cry
#Jokes
#Laugh
#Things
#Tough
Jim Bakker. He's lost everything, he's ruined. And the worst thing of all he still has to wake up to her!
- Sam Kinison
#Everything
#Lost
#Up
#Wake Up
#Worst
When has stand-up comedy been kind to anyone? It goes after anyone who's the target. Comedy attacks, man.
- Sam Kinison
#Comedy
#Man
#Stand-Up Comedy
#Target
Jesus is still up in Heaven, thumbing through his Bible, going 'Where did I say build a water slide?'
- Sam Kinison
#Bible
#Build
#Heaven
#Through
#Water
I've never been against women. That anti-feminist rap is bogus. I think men should be nice to women, buy them diamonds.
- Sam Kinison
#Be Nice
#Men
#Never
#Nice
#Women
Stand-up comedy is an art form and it dies unless you expand it.
- Sam Kinison
#Art
#Comedy
#Expand
#Stand-Up Comedy
In the 1990s, it's OK to do comedy about the Chernobyl disaster or the Space Shuttle blowing up. It's acceptable to ridicule the Pope or the President of the United States, but God forbid you do a joke... about gays. The gay community is the last sacred cow in this society.
- Sam Kinison
#Community
#Disaster
#God
#Society
#Space
Not that I want to put the entire rap music style down - I just don't like it. And I know somewhere there's gotta be another guy like that. There's gotta be a guy just like that - just like me. There's gotta be somebody, somewhere... Maybe, maybe an assassin type.
- Sam Kinison
#Assassin
#Know
#Me
#Music
#Style
You don't know what a rough crowd is. If all I have to do is go make people laugh, that's nothing. Let me tell you what a tough crowd is. A tough crowd is going to a morning service and you got six people there and you gotta pat your house payment. That's a tough crowd.
- Sam Kinison
#Me
#Morning
#Nothing
#Service
#Tough
My view of life is, 'If you're going to miss Heaven, why miss it by two inches? Miss it!
- Sam Kinison
#Heaven
#Life
#Two
#View
#Why
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