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Jay Mohr
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#Tags
If it doesn't know what to charge you for nosebleed seats, your team sucks.
- Jay Mohr
#Charge
#Know
#Sucks
#Team
#Your
If it has to sell its mascot, your team sucks.
- Jay Mohr
#Sell
#Sucks
#Team
#Your
But if applause throws off your timing, then you're not the kind of comedian I would like to see. All you have to do is stand there and take it.
- Jay Mohr
#Applause
#See
#Stand
#Timing
#Your
I never minded George Steinbrenner spending obscene amounts of money to put the best product on the field.
- Jay Mohr
#Best
#Field
#Money
#Never
#Product
I wasn't the guy everyone liked. I was the guy that wouldn't shut up.
- Jay Mohr
#Everyone
#Guy
#Liked
#Shut Up
#Up
When human beings stop progressing at an endeavor, they stop enjoying it and move on to something else. Not golfers. Masochists, all of them.
- Jay Mohr
#Endeavor
#Human
#Move
#Something
#Stop
Unfortunately, there are no mulligans when it comes to pro football contracts.
- Jay Mohr
#Contracts
#Football
#Pro
#Unfortunately
I hate golf. I do not understand how anyone can enjoy it, much less love it.
- Jay Mohr
#Enjoy
#Golf
#Hate
#Love
#Understand
I think I made a mistake once... yeah... it was only once.
- Jay Mohr
#Made
#Mistake
#Once
#Only
#Think
Not everyone likes sports. Gandhi and Malcolm X come to mind.
- Jay Mohr
#Come
#Everyone
#Likes
#Mind
#Sports
Why are baseball managers the only coaches who dress up like the players?
- Jay Mohr
#Baseball
#Dress
#Players
#Who
#Why
True Yankees are born, not made.
- Jay Mohr
#Born
#Made
#True
#Yankees
Fantasy football is not only a good thing, but a great thing.
- Jay Mohr
#Fantasy
#Football
#Good
#Great
#Only
I think golf is a waste of time and a waste of a sunny afternoon. I also stink at it. I have never found anything, including divorce and a sexual harassment suit, more frustrating.
- Jay Mohr
#Afternoon
#Golf
#Harassment
#Never
#Time
You know how to tell if the teacher is hung over? Movie Day.
- Jay Mohr
#Day
#How
#Know
#Teacher
#Tell
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